Wednesday, September 06, 2006

In Honor Of The Holiday

There were a few things I've wanted to mention, but I really didn't have the motivation to do so today. Then, I found out that it was Fight Procrastination Day, and I figured I could get it together to ramble on about a few things.

Steve Irwin

First off, I was always a fan of Steve Irwin. I used to watch the show a lot. As a kid, I grew up with Marlin Perkins and Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom, as well as any National Geographic Shows I could find. They were interesting, and I loved to learn about animals.

But then, along came The Crocodile Hunter. Steve Irwin was the Johnny Knoxville of nature shows. He taught you about animals in a much more exciting way, by placing himself in what appeared to be harm's way. He knew what he was doing, though, and although you knew he would always be able to escape the croc's jaws in time, there was always that thrill, that adrenaline ruch that maybe, just maybe, this time he wouldn't.

And then, one time he didn't.

It doesn't matter that it was a stingray, or that it was a freak accident, eventually things caught up with him. Regardless of his skill or knowledge, it was bound to happen in his line of work They say you're more likely to die in a car accident than be killed by terrorists, but if you hang out with terrorists all day, I bet it skews the odds.

So it was really tragic, and I think that the world has lost a great entertainer, one who taught kids about the world, nature and conservation while at the same time making them scream in a giddy sort of terror.

RIP, Steve.


Those of you that read Life In The Pumpkin Shell are Familiar with this Pickles. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about real pickles - the kind that we spent all day Monday canning. Making pickles is a smelly, labor-intensive process, and nobody in their right mind should do it. It's expensive, the house smells vinegary for days after, and there is no instant gratification. It's weeks before you even know if they're any good.

Still, that's what we did for over 12 hours on Monday. It felt good. It felt like the way summer should be brought to an end. It felt like tradition.

Nobody would ever make their own pickles unless they wanted to, or they had to. And it felt like we were carrying on the traditions of our ancestors, preserving the summer's harvest to last all winter (nevermind that our harvest came from the farmer's market, not from the sweat of our brows or the bounty of our lands), just to have the energy to plant again in spring.

I will say that the most satisfying part of pickles (other than eating them, which won't happen for quite some time) is that tiny metallic *ping!* that echoes through the house as the jars cool and they begin to seal. The *ping* is an integral part of the process; it means that you've canned them right, and even if they taste awful, at least they won't kill you.

So, I'll let you know how they taste in a few weeks, but until then, we have tomatoes to can...

The Bacon Wallet

In a way that made me feel really hip, people started blogging all over about the bacon wallet a few weeks ago, like these posts here and here. I felt particularly hip because I bought one in Seattle weeks prior at the world's greatest store, Archie Mcphee.

I think this makes me a sort of trendsetter, even if it's a geeky trend...

If you want a bacon wallet of your own, go to the source. Go to Archie for it.

Four-Legged Chickens

Abishag and children were over at my house for hot dogs this weekend, and as their little dog ran about the backyard chasing and being chased by Shane, it came up that he had stolen a drumstick from her daughter a few nights prior. Her daughter was bummed because it had been the last.

We joked briefly about the leg being the best part of a chicken, and how it was a shame that they only had two. Then I forgot about it.

Until I saw this story.

A four-legged chicken was born in New Zealand.

Now, you all know how much I enjoy the discovery of new animals to be eaten, so I wonder if there isn't a way to breed chickens this way. According to the story, it's happened before (and in fact, I remember a story on The Daily Show years ago where it was pointed out that it looked like they had taken one chicken and simply shoved it up another chicken's ass).

I can't find anyone mentioning that they've eaten one of these chickens or discussing the possibility of breeding them.

Just think, though, if there were two more legs on the table. It would resolve more than a few arguements, I'm sure,

Link to story

And lastly...

One Hell Of A Souvenir

So this guy from the UK goes on vacation in Ireland and dies of a heart attack. They perform an autopsey and send him back to the UK. When he gets to the UK, they discover he's got an extra heart and lungs thrown inside him.

Do they just have extras lying around over there? Are they used like packing peanuts to keep his own guts from rattling about during shipping?

It's just a bit odd, don't you think? Link

So, that's all I have right now. Until next time, have a happy Fight Procrastination Day, and be sure to do something you don't feel like doing!


Anonymous said...

Fight procrastination day, you say?

I'll be sure to celebrate tomorrow.

Jennifer said...

Irwin, sigh. I'm so going to miss that guy. I was a Wild Kingdom addict in the 70s -- pretty daring stuff for the times. I'm just hoping Irwin's unfortunate demise ends up having the Jesus Effect: even more powerful after death. I know that's corny, but I've become so ecologically conscientious lately that it's now keeping me awake at night.

Pickles: If you bought them at the farmer's market, they were obviously grown within a 100 mile radius of your home. According to Today's Granolahead, this is what we're supposed to be aiming for these days, so kudos. I don't know that I could go totally 100-Mile Lifestyle because of the Vodka Factor. Perhaps I should learn to distill my own spirits from locally grown potatoes?

(Eastern Market? Did you go to Eastern Market, WITHOUT ME??? If so, you bastard! If not, you should have!)

PS: I harvested my first tomato of the season yesterday. The next one might be ripe before the killing frost. So much for my efforts to infuse Mr Z with prostate-happy lycopene!

Bacon Wallet: Prettier and smellier than the Duct Tape Wallet, therefore probably more expensive, so I'll stick to jamming folding money into my Wonder-bra. CC & DL go into the back pocket. Dude, you should have bought a bacon bra!

Four Legged Chickens: IN NEW ZEALAND???? Cornsakes! New Zealanders are effing HELLBENT on keeping genetically modified foods out of their country, and now they're pulling the ol' "we've got a four legged chicken and you don't" trick? They're as bad as the Aussies. I am now boycotting all places antipodean. Not.

Does anyone say "Not" anymore, or was that so totally eighties I ought to be ashamed?

Souvenir: Beaumont Hospital, eh? Could it be coincidence?

Allow me to suggest, in case of emergency, go to Providence, in Southfield. Elder Eena was born there, and came home with the correct number of body parts. Had she been born at Beaumont, we'd probably have brought home a four legged daughter. Eating her extra legs would have, most likely, landed us in jail.

Hey -- you have any Spanish language tapes I could borrow?

stray_thoughts said...

That was a lot to throw at me all at once...

If I didn't have procrastination I'd be swamped all the time.

Steve Irwin rocked...moment of silence...followed by a "Crikey!"

So annoyed by the date on that jar of pickles you gave me...just two and a half more weeks! ugg.

The bacon wallet makes me hungry everytime I see it...note to self: do not go grocery shopping or out to eat with a bacon wallet.

I remember that Daily Show skit...but am sad to see that four legged chickens have not become commonplace...why stop at four? We all love the chicken leg anyway!

About the souvenir...enough already...I'm sorry I didn't get you any spare organs when I was in Ireland, but I was sure you said Rugby Scarf...not Replacement Heart.

Zilla- "Not" was more 90's I think, and it is still totally awesome!


stray_thoughts said...

Also...if I didn't procrastinate then I'd never read these blogs!

Angeline Rose Larimer said...

I was going to leave a comment earlier, but I got distracted by the bacon wallet link.


*I've canned Pickles. Not MY Pickles. Cucumber pickles. I felt very productive while doing it.
That was four years ago, and they're still sitting in the cupboard. Sigh.